November 3, 2011

Welcome Back

Welcome back to my world. I have been missing for a very long time. Over a year, in fact. It's been a very challenging past 13 months for myself and my family. We have faced many trials, losses and disappointments along the way. But I know that my God carries us when we are weak. I've held on to a good deal of sadness this year and through my friends, my family, my church, and my creations I am processing and healing.
Not long after my last posting, both my Granny and my husband's Grandmother fell ill. Both left this world within three - four weeks. Two different women, two different backgrounds, two different illnesses, but ultimately, the same end.
Before I saw my Granny for the last time I stayed up most of the previous night creating a gift for her. She was always one to send a Christmas letter, a birthday card, a thanks for thinking of me call....Christmas was approaching and though I knew she was weak, I was hoping she would be able to pass on a few of these cards to those who helped her in her medical struggles. But that never happened. Her illness increasingly robbed her energy and her life. The cards were returned to me in the box, along with the pen and postage stamps I had included. I put the box in a drawer and didn't look at it again until just a week ago. My heart broke with the flood of memories.
...the love I poured into making the cards. the box didn't turn out perfectly but I knew it was ok
because I never saw Granny as one to expect perfection,
just that you did the work in the first place. I prayed that night for her to regain her strength,
to suddenly become well and be able to return home.
I knew what the prognosis was, but I also knew a miracle could take place. That miracle came as the release of her soul to Heaven on Dec. 24th. She was free at last. We were left to mourn.
I miss her daily. I hope that by taking these cards out of the drawer and eventually passing them on to my loved ones with my personal messages for them, that my love for them will be felt the way I felt my Granny's love for me when she last hugged me and told me how glad she was that I came; that she was afraid I wouldn't.
These aren't my best cards.
They are not near perfect.
None of us are and we probably shouldn't expect to be.
Just do the job anyway.
Love, Trina
(no idea why some of these insist on uploading sideways!!!)

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